Cash for Dishwashers???? You have got to be kidding!

I guess everyone at Sears and and Best Buy is getting all geeked up because the "Cash for Appliances" bill is about to go into effect. The bill states that if you buy certain energy star appliances you will be eligible for up to a $200 rebate/refund. The intention is very clearly to stimulate the American Consumer.

This is just a few degrees of seperation away from Cash from Clunkers both are intended to stimulate consumption and have nothing to do with creating actual jobs. In other words they are trying to make the collapse of the credit bubble less painful. Please tell me if you notice anything kind of non-American about this list from Yahoo! :

The Top Ten Cash for Clunkers Trade-Ins:

1. 1998 Ford Explorer

2. 1997 Ford Explorer

3. 1996 Ford Explorer

4. 1999 Ford Explorer

5. Jeep Grand Cherokee

6. Jeep Cherokee

7. 1995 Ford Explorer

8. 1994 Ford Explorer

9. 1997 Ford Windstar

10. 1999 Dodge Caravan

The Top Ten Cash for Clunkers New Cars:

1. Ford Focus

2. Honda Civic

3. Toyota Corolla

4. Toyota Prius

5. Ford Escape

6. Toyota Camry

7. Dodge Caliber

8. Hyundai Elantra

9. Honda Fit

10. Chevy Cobalt

Go America?????

Well in the Spirit of Government Largesse I've come up with my own snappy names for some programs that are already in existance:

Cash for Food: Uncle Sam will give you a Credit Card with flags or eagles or some such shit so you can buy food. Cost 95 Billion in FY 2009

Cash for Drugs: A Government program that will try to prevent you from dying if you get ill, hey life's a crapshoot good luck! Cost 561 Billion in FY 2009

Cash for Terrorist Extermination: Nobody likes a terrorist, they have a nasty habit of blowing up things/people we like and with this program we can cut down on the liklihood of another terrorist attack. Cost 549 Billion in FY 2009

Cash for the Old and Lazy: Why work? If you are old or "disabled" there's no need with this government program. Cost 581 Billion in FY 2009

Cash for Cribs: Paying the rentman sucks, let Uncle Sam pick up the tab on some fine section 8 housing. Cost 40 Billion in FY 2009

Cash for Credit Bubbles: Creating Bubbles in Internet startups and housing isnt' cheap. In fact a lot of that money had to be borrowed but until we can actually devalue the dollar we'll just continue to make the minimum payment. Cost 237 Billion in FY 2009.


Total of programs: 2 Trillion 63 Billion dollars & 00/100 cents.

Oh and in case you missed there will be a budget shortfall this year (Tax Revenues - Government Expenditures) of only 1,580,000,000. This was better than expected because the banks didn't implode like everybody thought they would....but there's always next year.

Hey if you made it this far, show a little love ======>